Quote of the Day, 2/6/07

A caption on a photo at Foxnews.com: "Frost forms on a sea lion at the Milwaukee County Zoo; the cold has killed at least 9 across the U.S."

Nine sea lions?


Misplaced modifiers...

"While working on his master's degree, the Lord called Mike to preach."

I don't think I have to comment.

Quote of the Day, 2/3/07

Dave Barry is covering the Super Bowl. He offers suggestions to Miami residents for assisting visitors from the Midwest:

Midwesterners tend to be friendly, polite, honest and trusting, so down here they are dead meat. We need to keep an eye on them. If you see a visitor who looks confused, don't hesitate to offer help:

YOU: Hello! I see you are from the Midwest.

VISITORS: Why, yes we are! How could you tell?

YOU: By your non-taut, yogurt-colored bodies. Do you need directions?

VISITORS: Yes, thanks! We want to go to the beach.

YOU: Like that?


YOU: We have no beach.

See? By going a just little out of your way to help, you have averted what could have been an unfortunate situation.