Textbook backorders and credit card activation

I finally managed to find a phone number for ecampus.com's customer service. (Couldn't find it on their website, so I had to Google it.) I asked about the book that I ordered August 21 that still hadn't arrived. I received email from ecampus.com August 31 (the last date by which the book was supposed to ship) telling me that the book had not arrived from their supplier yet, but I hadn't heard anything in the nearly two weeks since that email. The nice person on the phone found out that the book was on backorder and that they did not have an estimated arrival date. (Apparently they weren't planning on telling me this???) So, I cancelled my order and went and bought the book for about $50 more in the campus bookstore. (And, of course, I also spent over $6 on photocopies while I was waiting for the book to arrive.)

So, since I was going to have to buy a textbook, I decided to call to activate my new Visa so I could get points (woohoo!) when I bought the book. So I called Bank of America. Do you have any idea how many additional products they try to sell you when you call to activate your card? Sheesh!

Prerecorded female voice: If you would like information on how you can protect your account and give us more money by enrolling in a special program, press 1 now.

[long pause while I refrain from pressing 1]

Voice: We're sorry that you aren't interested in our offer to protect your account from blah blah blah by giving us more money. This is a very good idea, because people could steal your credit card and use it and ruin your credit rating and you'll never be able to buy anything again and your family will starve in the streets. We tell you this because we care about our customers. For more information, please press 1 now. Otherwise, press 2.

[I press 2]

Voice: We're sorry that you don't want to give us more money and we sincerely hope that nobody steals your credit card, but they probably will. We care about you. Please enter your 16-digit credit card number.

[I enter it]

Voice: Thank you. While we are processing this information, I will ramble on about a special service in which you give us more money and if you die we'll pay at least part of your credit card bill because we care about you so much.

Me: Cut the crap and activate my card already! I have class in 15 minutes!

Voice: If you would like more information, please press 1.

[I wait]

Voice: Are you sure, you idiot? With this service, you will give us money, and in the unlikely event that you are hospitalized or die or are dismembered in a tragic accident involving a farm implement,
we will pay up to $10,000 of the amount that you irresponsibly charged to your credit card, because obviously your family can't afford your entire credit card bill in addition to your funeral, and we'd rather you not rot in the street unless it's far away from our office, because we care about you so much. Blah blah blah blah give us money blah blah blah blah blah. Please press 1 now if you realize how important this is. If you care nothing about your family's future security in the unlikely event that something should happen to you--not that it would, but it isn't totally out of the realm of possibility--but if you have no sense of responsibility whatsoever and want your children to be sold to third-world countries to work as Dell customer service representatives to pay your credit card bill when you die, please press 2.

[I press 2]

Voice: Thank you. Your card has been activated. If you would ever like to give us more money to try to stave off your untimely death, please call.


Monica said...

HA! Sounds like my credit card company. And every other automated service that is out there only to make life that much more miserable.

Becca said...

Lol. At least the financial institutions will always be there to serve as the guilt-free joke targets of society. It's a valuable (free) service they provide. Yesterday I was at the bank opening an account and reading posters plastered everywhere about insurance for your insurance, for in case your insurance refuses to cover something they should. Um, isn't that what "suing the insurance company" is for?